- 43 percent were white-Hispanic couples;
- 14.4 percent were white-Asian:
- 11.9 percent were white-black;
and the remainder were other combinations.
Monday, December 29, 2014
The total number of Americans who listed their ethnicity as “mixed race” was just under 9 million in 2010.
Of the 275,500 new interracial marriages in 2010:
- 43 percent were white-Hispanic couples;
- 14.4 percent were white-Asian:
- 11.9 percent were white-black;
and the remainder were other combinations.
- 43 percent were white-Hispanic couples;
- 14.4 percent were white-Asian:
- 11.9 percent were white-black;
and the remainder were other combinations.
Black and White
In the United States there has been an historical disparity between Black female and Black male exogamy ratios: according to the United States Census Bureau, there were 354,000 White female/Black male and 196,000 Black female/White male marriages in March 2009, representing a ratio of 181:100. This traditional disparity has seen a rapid decline over the last two decades, contrasted with its peak in 1981 when the ratio was still 371:100. In 2007, 4.6% of all married Blacks in the United States were wed to a White partner, and 0.4% of all Whites were married to a Black partner.
The role of gender in interracial divorce dynamics, found in social studies by Jenifer L. Bratter and Rosalind B. King, was highlighted when examining marital instability among Black/White unions. White wife/Black husband marriages show twice the divorce rate of White wife/White husband couples by the 10th year of marriage,whereas Black wife/White husband marriages are 44% less likely to end in divorce than White wife/White husband couples over the same period.
THE MOST PAINFUL THINGS A MAN CAN SAY TO A WOMAN(www.meetinterracialwomen.com)
We can let most of the little passive aggressive comments or teasing roll off our backs. But, there are some things that, when a guy says them, send us into panic mode and ignites way more insecurity than men realize.
You’re being dramatic
In so many places—TV shows, movies, men’s magazines—women are stereotyped as being overly sensitive. And—guess what? After ALL of those decades of being given that reputation, it did affect us. What. A. Surprise. Subconsciously, we’re aware of that stereotype every time we make the decision to bring up a problem and begin an argument. So, if you pull out the “you’re being dramatic” card, we arefuming inside. You’ve shoved us into the category we work so hard to stay out of.
That doesn’t feel very good
There are two ways to direct someone during sex. “Hey, can you do a little more of this? A little more to the right. A little faster.” And then there is “That doesn’t feel very good.” If a man puts it like that, it sounds like what is really going through his head is “what is she thinking? Has she ever had sex before?” They are just very cruel words, and we probably aren’t going to perform very well after we hear them.
You’ve gotten a little bit bigger
In very rare circumstances—and very rare couples—can a man tell a woman this and it not come with major consequences. You might be right. We may have put on a few pounds. But it’s one thing when a friend says this (to help us out) and a boyfriend says this. Listen—we know if we’ve put on weight. We’re already on the task of losing it. If you tell us it, then we don’t enjoy meals in front of you. We’re not going to walk around naked in front of you as much. We’re probably not going to have sex with you as much…
Why can’t we just be more like (insert other couple here)
If you want us to be more adventurous, more affectionate, more romantic—terrific. Let us know. But don’t phrase it as “we should be more like (insert name of couple you’re friends with).” Then we will just become subconsciously bitter toward the female in that couple. Really, comparing us to another couple makes it feel more like something is wrong with our relationship, rather than there is just room for improvement. But, if you have a couple that you want to be like, then we feel like you have been analyzing a lot more about our relationship than you’ve been letting on. You may say you just admire that couple because they’re more romantic, but we’re going to analyze the rest of them.
I need more “me” time
If a guy says this (and, granted, he is allowed to say it) all we can think about is when to give him that time. Relationships are supposed to be about being comfortable—about not being afraid to give of yourself and make yourself vulnerable. If a guy says “I need more me time” we feel like we are in the beginning phases of dating again, is it okay to text now? Should I stop by or will that annoy him? Should I make him that surprise dinner or does he want “me” time tonight? It’s something we need to learn to live with, because it’s something a man is allowed to ask for. But, let’s be real: it hurts.
You’ve got issues
I’ve got issues?! OKAY….? If a guy says in the middle of us ranting about something or arguing “You’ve got issues” we suddenly feel like he sees us as a broken person. He is making the problem at hand larger. There we were thinking we were arguing about what time to have dinner and suddenly, apparently, we have all other sorts of issues that are totally “apparent” to him. What are they? Daddy issues? Napoleon complex? And of course, a man will never elaborate when we ask “what do you mean by ‘issues’?!” He is just saying it to make you insecure and doubt what you are upset about.
When it comes to relationships, men and women tend to want the same things – it just seems we want or need them in different ways. For most men, respect and love are synonymous and are weighed the same, but how we show love and respect to a man may not always fall in line with what we women expect from our mate. Small gestures can yield great rewards when dealing with the heart of a man, so applying some of these simple practices can breathe air into your relationship by simply letting him know that you love and appreciate him….just as he is.
Gas him up!
Men like compliments too – so if your man has a killer smile, amazing washboard abs or big biceps – tell him! We all know how great we feel when a man pays us a sincere compliment, so letting your man know that you love his style or the way he walks will make him feel 12 feet tall! Choose something specific, and maybe unexpected, that you find attractive about him, and let him know in a genuine way that you only have eyes for him. Try to tell him 3 things that you love about him every day. He’ll be on Cloud 9 for weeks!
Make him feel needed
Most men like to feel useful – whether it’s fixing the kitchen sink, screwing in a light bulb or solving your crisis at work. I’m not suggesting you nag him to death or bog him down with chores, but find ways to let him know you need him by asking him for his help or his advice every once in a while. Men are great problem solvers, and they truly want to help the woman they love through their challenges. The reason most men shy away from “independent” women is because they sometimes send a message that they don’t “need” a man. But being self sufficient doesn’t mean the men in our lives serve no purpose, so let him be the man and thank him for all that he does on a daily basis.
Stroke his ego in the bedroom
Even if he isn’t the best lover you’ve ever had, make him feel as if he is. Men can be very delicate when it comes to their sexual prowess, and they take pleasing their woman very seriously. Let him know how attracted you are to him sexually, how he turns you on, and what you love about his body. Send him a text saying you can’t wait to get home to him and turn him out, then drink a Red Bull and get ready. He’ll be so turned up you’ll need all your energy to handle the monster you’ve created!Friday, December 26, 2014
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Interracial dating/marriage has occurred often in my family (military brat), so I never saw anything different about dating someone who wasn't black. Of course, that isn't always the case with others. Anyone, I would like to hear the stories of other black ladies/men who are in interracial relationships. What are the highlights and woes that you face?My Boyfriend [23] and I [F/22] have been together for a year and a half, although we were hooking up before we made it official. We have known each other since my freshman year of college (his sophomore) but we didn't start hooking up/dating until I was a junior (and we graduated together). We were in the same fiend circle and went to the same parties but barely spoke to each other. Finally, he randomly told me to add him on Skype over Winter break, and things just kind of went from there. He chase me for three mints until I finally gave in. We made it official the day after my birthday in August. Funny enough, I am his first black girlfriend (not his first interracial relationship) while he isn't my first white boyfriend. I live our contrast. I am obviously black, dark hair, big brown eyes; he is pale, blonde haired, blue eyed male of Irish/Scottish/Danish descent. Still, we complement each other so well. He is my best friend. To our many friends, they love us together. We are no strangers to odd looks and whispers though. My boyfriend is more acutely aware of these and has in the past gotten into arguments with complete stranger (and sometimes acquaintances). The biggest issue we face though has more to do with his family than anything. While my family embraces this with open arms, his family (minus his most immediate members), are still warming up to it. I have high hopes that at some point, it won't even be an issue as I seem him as a large part of my future.
A funny thing: My boyfriend is in love with my curly hair. He will ask me to wear it out all the time and loves to play with the curls. He says it's me at my most natural and beautiful state, which has helped me to adore my own hair.
Here we are together celebrating our anniversary in September 2012 at a Bruce Springsteen concert in Jersey.(www.meetinterracialwomen.com)
Thursday, December 25, 2014
This story is about Ivy-Reece Hayes. She's a 16 year old girl from New York and she is very confident of herself. When Ivy-Reece and her dad move away from New York, she's devasted. That is, until she meets Chase Matthews. He's kind, sweet, and caring. She also meets DeAndre Jones. He's funny, laid-back, and a little mysterious. Ivy-Reece is infatuated with them both. There's just one thing though. Chase is white, and DeAndre is black. So it's up to Ivy-Reece to decide. Black or White?
True Stories About Interracial Hook-Ups, Dating, And Relationships
—— “I can’t say I’m sure it was just a race thing.”
I’m Hispanic and dated an Italian girl from college a few years ago. It wasn’t really a big deal for either of us. Her mom was sweet and I always felt like she had my back and made an effort to get to know me, but my girlfriend’s dad definitely gave off the “you’re not good enough for my daughter” vibe. Actually, I stopped by their house before our second date and he thought I was just her friend and we had a blast, chatting and laughing and watching sports while she got ready.
But the next time I stopped by to pick her up, after she had told him we were seeing each other, I felt the chill from him. It was only after this that I saw him as a doctor who watched Fox News a lot and not as the cool, hip dad he came off as initially. I can’t say I’m sure it was just a race thing. I was starting my career then and felt like he wanted someone more successful and established for his only daughter. Oh well, I’m established now.
I pretty much have dated Latinas and black girls since then. Not really for any particular reason, but just because those are the women I’ve been drawn to and have been drawn to me. But I guess I do miss the homemade pizza for dinner, if I’m honest.
True Stories About Interracial Hook-Ups, Dating, And Relationships
——“My mother actually asked him if his older brother was ‘as pink’ as he was…”
I’m a black girl who grew up in a predominately white neighborhood. When I was younger, my mom always told me I should date (and eventually marry) “within the race.”
When I invited my first serious boyfriend — who was white — to the house to meet my parents, my mother actually asked him if his older brother was “as pink” as he was, referring to his skin color. I was mortified. A few years later, when I was in college, she told me she had given up on the idea of me marrying a black doctor and was beginning to look forward to the day when she could meet her “zebra-baby” grandkids.
True Stories About Interracial Hook-Ups, Dating, And Relationships
——“You’re a lesbian, interracial couple? Wow.”
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It’s probably a mix of naïveté and the way infatuation clouds clarity, but throughout our now two-year relationship, race hasn’t been an issue for us. Of course, there are always the people who meet us for the first time and automatically assume the odds stacked against us. “You’re a lesbian, interracial couple? Wow.” But what those people see in us says far more about who they are than it does about who we are.
True Stories About Interracial Hook-Ups, Dating, And Relationships
—— “His mother had been recently mugged by a black man…”
I am Asian-American, and my college (and post-college) boyfriend was (and still is, I guess) half black and half white. We were driving cross-country one summer with two other friends, staying with whomever we could to save money. I had asked a friend who lived in Chicago if we could crash with his family. He enthusiastically said yes. This friend was Mexican-American and came from a middle-class family.
As we approached Chicago, I called him from a pay phone (this was pre-cell phone era) to let him know when we were arriving. He sounded very stressed; he said that we could no longer stay with him because his mother had been recently mugged by a black man and would not stand to have a black man in the house. He felt so bad that he said he would pay for a hotel. I told him he didn’t have to do that, but he insisted. He directed us to a hotel where he had already made a reservation. He probably had less money than we did, and the hotel, more like infested motel, certainly reflected that.
I recall much argument that night among us four travelers about what my friend should have done or what each of us would have done, but I never blamed him. Each generation can only try to make fewer mistakes than the last. Now, 20 years later, we are all still friends.
True Stories About Interracial Hook-Ups, Dating, And Relationships
——“Oh, I have a huge thing for Jewish guys.”
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Across the table from me was a South Korean guy who had watched videos of me eating KFC during his time serving for his home country’s national military. He had told me that watching my videos made him happy and miss America. Now we were on a first date because I am a crazy narcissist.
I asked him careful questions about his years in the service and his home country. He gave me polite answers and told me, a white boy from New York, that I should really make it over to Asia at some point.
“Do you speak Hebrew?” he asked.
I laughed at his question because I hadn’t even said that I was Jewish yet, and I definitely didn’t speak Hebrew. I’m one of those young chosen people who qualify as “Jew-ish” at best.
“Oh, I have a huge thing for Jewish guys. One time I memorized a whole Hebrew pop song just to impress this Israeli guy,” he said to me with eyes the size of my grandma’s matzoh balls. He started singing and I envisioned my Hebrew school teacher Mr. Shapiro correcting him sternly.
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